Elisa and the Disbelief

He should know better by now.

Last night I told Matt about his favorite performer. She’s coming…not to our town (of course) but to our state (at least) so I wanted to get tickets. She’ll be here at the end of March and there are only like 6 seats left. (None of them together.) I wanted to get tickets before (if we were going) we’d have to sit across the auditorium from one another. I would be alone in a crowd of strangers in a strange place in the dark which means I’d be hiding in the bathroom the whole time and there’s really no need to buy a ticket for me to sit in the bathroom. If I act now we could sit close enough to one another to see and wave hi.

Him: What are they playing?

Me: I don’t know. It didn’t say.

Him: Does she have a newer album than ——— —-?

Me: I have no idea.

Him: Well go to her site.

Me (typing away): Yeah. I did. It doesn’t say.

Him: It must say.

Me: Oh good lord.

The site comes up, I click around, it doesn’t say. Like I said.

Him: Who’s in the band?

Me: How the hell should I know?

Him: (sighing) CLICK ON “BAND.”

Me: Oh.

The page loads and the band comes up and I read him the four names. He inquires about the last one. I read the info and he says he’s never heard of that guy. I click on another guy to be helpful.

Him: He’s been with her a while.

I click on another name…no big deal.  I click on the name he recognized right away.

Him: He’s playing drums now? That’s good he never could sing. (Reading over my shoulder) Oh, he’s still doing vocals. Oops.

I take offense for the “never could sing” remark and read to him that it says he’s been singing since the age of eleven.

Me: Oh look! He is the child of a carpenter and an actress/singer/dancer. (slight pause) Just like Jesus!

Matt rolls his eyes and walks away.

Me: What? (I yell into the next room where he is breaking his Stop Smoking Campaign and is furiously lighting up.) She could have been an actress/singer/dancer. You don’t know!

Him: The VIRGIN MARY???

Me: Times were hard back then. She was a virgin so she wasn’t doing THAT. They were a resourceful people.  SHE HAD TO BE DOING SOMETHING WITH HER TIME AND TALENT TO MAKE MONEY FOR HER FAMILY!

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