I have completely lost the ability to multi-task. Maybe it’s because I’m old (41 this year), maybe it’s because I have a (very adorable, but non-sleeping) baby. I don’t know. Maybe after the life I’ve had I figure I’ve earned the right to do one thing at a time and sit down when I have an extra 10 minutes….or 60. 😐
When my ex and I were together I had 5 small children (all between a year to year and a half apart) in the house. I was used to constantly thinking for 6 or 7 people and a dog. I was used to doing 4 or 5 “little things” (get me juice, where’s my math paper, Corbin hit me) while doing 2 or 3 “big things” (making dinner, cleaning the girls’ room, painting the hallway). I could talk on the phone while checking email, dusting, packing backpacks for school, dressing 2 kids and changing the baby. I had no problem in a room full of people half my size each with lists of demands that have to be met NOW, coupled with a dog running through them and knocking things over. Going to run errands was as simple as making sure I had everything I needed, the kids had a pack of stuff for the truck, everyone in diapers had a clean one, the kids out of diapers had gone potty, everyone had shoes (preferably matching) and favorite toys to ride with and all five were buckled up into their car seats each with his or her own sippy cup. Oh, and don’t forget the diaper bag. But now?
Now the thought of that makes me very, very sleepy. The kids went to live with their dad after our divorce and my world suddenly became very, very quiet. For a year or so I had a hard time functioning just because everything stopped. It was too quiet. I had a list of things I had to do. For me. My stuff. And then that was it. I was thinking for one person. Well, I have my guy so it went to two. Now I have Abby. I’m up to three. But still, there’s a lag in my brain. It slipped gears and is very confused. I have a lot of “extra” time on my hands and have no idea what to do with it. The weight of not knowing makes me sleepy. I’ve turned into a couch potato whereas in my former life I would have given my right eye for ten minutes to lean against something nevermind sit down.
I used to be able to try to schedule things I had to do between big kid school drop off and little kid preschool drop off, then do as much as I could, then little kid preschool pick up and lunch, hopefully naps for the little ones and more stuff before realizing just how late it is and grabbing everything and everybody who was home to run to school to pick up the big kids. Then it was kid time. Homework, stories about their days, stuff that came home, stuff that had to go back, playtime, dinnertime, Daddy home, bathtime, playtime, bedtime, kitchen cleanup, bedtime, dog time, bedtime, collapse for a minute, and “why can’t you stay in bed?” ((0.o))
These days I’m totally worn out by 6pm (from WHAT???), the house is usually very clean (not weekends) and I have nothing to do. At least, I can’t get my brain around being more laid back, about not having as much to multi-task, about having time to WHATEVER!
Today I made a list to keep me from getting “foggy” and “confused” or even “overwhelmed”. So far so good. However, with the time I have I seem to have developed a slight case of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. My bathroom towels (bath as well as hand) HAVE TO be folded in thirds and hung evenly. I don’t feel like things are in order until there is NOTHING on my kitchen counter. I have to have the toys picked up before I go to bed (and not just “picked up” — everything with pieces are put together again first, THEN put in the toy basket). I bought Abby a shopping cart seat so she wouldn’t have to touch the germ-ridden shopping carts when we go to the store or the high chairs when we go out to eat (how often does that happen? LOL). Almost every day I disinfect her toys so she doesn’t get sick. I rub her hands with sanitizer after she touches something icky. I Lysol common surfaces in our house DAILY so we don’t get sick. The other day I caught myself polishing the toilet paper holder with Windex. (Who does that?) But today I’ve outdone myself. Today I dusted my vacuum cleaner.
Have Lysol and Swiffer duster. Will travel.